Peace, family! Welcome back to The Tea! This year has already been intense, beautiful, challenging, and life-giving. We are hopeful that last month’s issue inspired you to take care of yourself and your beloved community. In case you missed it, we talked about The Healing Practice of Kink and uplifted some of our favorite community folks stewarding our collective care. Here at M4BL, many of us are resting, healing, getting life-affirming surgeries, building power with each other, and gearing up for Pride next month. We hope this issue holds you up and helps you feel seen and connected. We are all in this together!
In this issue, we are raising awareness about the reproductive rights of Black TGNCIQ (transgender, intersex, and gender-nonconforming, and queer) people; uplifting the life of one of our trans sisters who was murdered due to patriarchy and transphobia; sharing a few tips on how to celebrate Mother’s Day inclusively; and, of course, putting you on to What We Are Vibin’ To this month! Thanks for reading!
The fight for reproductive justice, which SisterSong Women of Color Collective defines as “the human right to maintain personal bodily autonomy, have children, not have children, and parent the children we have in safe and sustainable communities” has been grueling and devastating. From states imposing abortion bans and criminalizing pregnant people and their supporters who take matters into their own hands, to denying folks full access to comprehensive sexual and reproductive health and abortion care—the tactics have been vicious.
Denying access to safe, legal abortion is part of a long history of reproductive control that the state has enacted against Black women, girls, and TGNCIQ people. History teaches us that the war on Black cis women and girls and TGNCIQ folks serves larger structures of power and domination, including colonialism, chattel slavery, racial capitalism, cisheterosexism, and ableism.
Black feminists have exposed how this war has been promoted and justified through persistent narratives framing Black cis women and girls, and queer and trans people as inherently inhuman. Anti-choice narratives rely not only on patriarchy, but also on racism, misogynoir, transphobia, and homophobia to do their work.
Before this iteration of the war on reproductive justice was waged, we were already in an uphill battle for holistic care for TGNCIQ folks. “All people who are capable of becoming pregnant—which may include queer cis women, transmasculine people, (intersex, gender-expansive, gender non-conforming) and nonbinary people—have a need for full-spectrum pregnancy, family planning and abortion care.”*
We have multitudes of experiences, perceptions, needs, and barriers that prevent us from receiving the care we need and deserve. According to the Guttmacher Institute, “a recent study suggests that queer and trans people who can get pregnant are more likely than [cishet people] to have an unintended pregnancy, a pregnancy when younger than 20 years old, or an abortion—a finding that suggest structural barriers to contraceptive care and a need for TGNCIQ-inclusive comprehensive sex education [and resources].”
Abortion care is health care, and it is absolutely essential to a thriving future for all Black people.
We will not give up on our fight for that future.
Our Vision for Black Lives calls for full access to comprehensive sexual and reproductive health care and the elimination of discriminatory barriers to health care for all people. We are also committed to amplifying and supporting organizations that have been fighting this fight. SisterSong, Black Feminist Future, and New Voices for Reproductive Justice are some of the incredible organizations continuing to lead the work.
*Source: Not Up for Debate: LGBTQ People Need and Deserve Tailored Sexual and Reproductive Health Care
Who are some amazing folks in the TGNCIQ community that you’d like to see featured in The Tea? Living or Ancestors. Well-known or Unsung.
Nominate them here.
Last month, in Philadelphia, we lost another one of our trans sisters to violence. Miia Love Parker was only 25 years old. “Miia’s friends describe her as someone who lit up a room when she entered,” according to the Advocate. The person suspected of taking her life was someone she knew, which is one of the most common scenarios when it comes to violence against Black trans women.
At the time this was written, at least ten other trans, gender-nonconforming, or nonbinary individuals’ lives have been lost due to transphobic violence in 2022, and at least six of those folks were Black trans women.
Our hearts go out to Miia’s loved ones and community. We hate that this happened, and it breaks our hearts to share these stories. Every day, we are building a world in which we shouldn’t have to share those stories. We also feel that it’s so important to reiterate the urgency of protecting Black TGNCIQ lives. Each day is a new opportunity to heal and protect our community.
Transphobia is a tactic used to uphold patriarchy—a system of domination whereby the wealthy, white, male ruling class has authority over everyone else and violently enforces gender norms while regulating our lives and behavior through legislation and social stigma. All of us have the ability to enact patriarchal and transphobic behaviors. Reflect on ways you intentionally or inadvertently reinforce transphobia, and do the work to change.
Violence against TGNCIQ communities persists because, even if we don’t consider ourselves transphobic, we normalize transphobic behavior such as exclusion, othering, and humiliation. When you see something like this happen, intervene by naming that what is happening is dehumanizing.
Self-reflection and calling out transphobic behavior are important, and today and every day, our mandate is to organize! Help us build enough people and political power to have the governing and distributive authority to create, shape, influence, and set political agendas; create viable alternatives to harmful institutions such as the police; significantly mitigate harm to our communities; and strengthen our political, economic, and cultural power.
Black-led TGNCIQ organizations need resources and infrastructure to abolish old systems and build new ones. Become a recurring donor to a Black-led TGNCIQ formation like Black Trans Media, SNAP4FREEDOM, and For the Gworls.
Text PROTECT to 90975 to stay plugged into our plan for Black TGNCIQ liberation.
Who are some amazing folks in the TGNCIQ community that you’d like to see featured in The Tea? Living or Ancestors. Well-known or Unsung.
Nominate them here.
Black families today are gender-expansive (an umbrella term sometimes used to describe people who expand notions of gender expression and identity beyond perceived or expected societal gender norms1), interrupting perceptions of what a family looks like. They include so many possibilities—and that’s a beautiful thing! Just to name a few examples: There are more out and proud TGNCIQ parents and kids than ever before, gentle parenting styles, adoption of kids (legally and otherwise), polyamorous parents, community-raised children, and so much more. When holidays like Mother’s Day come around, we have the opportunity to celebrate Black families more abundantly and inclusively!
Gender is expansive, and celebrating the nurturing and care of children shouldn’t be limited to our past limited beliefs and constructs. This Mother’s Day, take the time to appreciate all TGNCIQ parents raising Black children.
Families may choose to celebrate one, both, or neither parent on Mother’s Day. There is no one-size-fits-all approach. Transgender parents may not celebrate according to traditional gender norms. If you have an LGBTQIA+ family in your life and you’re unsure about wishing them a happy Mother’s Day, ask if and how they celebrate instead of making assumptions.2
This is a great time to show support to TGNCIQ families and children by supporting their future well-being. Click here for more information and resources on how to fight back.
1 Source: https://pflag.org/glossary
2 Source: How to celebrate Mother’s Day in a way that includes all LGBTQ families
This is What We Are Vibin’ To this month! Check out these dope queer and TGNCI folks from our community who are doing amazing things.
Spring is in the air. Click below to watch the official video for “In Bloom (in the woods)” by Moses Sumney, from the conceptual live performance film Blackalachia.
We’ve been loving and obsessively watching Lizzo’s new show, Watch Out for the Big Grrrls. Check out the trailer below, and click here to stream the first episode for free. It’s giving fierceness, body positivity, fat acceptance, collective care, and all the good feels!
“Having Kids With My Wife Showed Me That Black Queer Moms Need More Support”
By Mylin Stokes Kennedy for Refinery 29, Unbothered Birth Rights series
“Free motherhood looks like being able to mother my kids without the judgment of society, without the pressures of this is how it’s supposed to be. No, I do not have to whoop my son, when he has a tantrum. That’s not the sole way of being a Black mom. So give me my space and my freedom to mother my children without your judgment, without the unsolicited opinions of what I should be doing—how I should dress and how I should talk around my kids.
We are very protective of our space, even though we are very transparent about our lives online, it is just about what we allow to come in. I want other Black queer women to see that this is an option; that you can marry who you love and have the family you desire. We’re thriving, breaking generational curses, and gentle parenting. We are doing everything that we can to raise empathetic and considerate human beings in this world that know they have our unconditional love and support. That is me and my wife’s biggest goal.”
Read the full article here.
What have you been vibin’ to this month? Let us know which Black TGNCIQ artists, books, movies, shows, etc., you have been feeling this month! We might feature them in future issues and credit you!
Share here.
